Thursday, February 4, 2010

Freaky Friday - Episode Eleven

Freaky Friday again Fuckers!

Theme : Geeks

We all know what a Geek is and what he or she looks like, right?

Yeah, its this bloke with the pocket protector and the thick specs.  Its the shrinking violet in the corner who is not quite sure of himself.  He is awkward and dorky with a idiotic anxious grin plastered on his face.  

The Geek is the one who's stylin' isn't quite there.  Like when you go into Woolworths and check out the shoes, yeah they're cute and very similar to the latest fashion trends but they don't 'quite make it'.  They are just a wee bit "off" - if you know what I mean?

Lets put it this way, A Geek is the guy who knew about Google before you did.  The guy who configured a server for fun at home instead of going out on a date with a girl.

Poor Fucking Plonker...

However, Geeks turn into successful businessmen, tycoons or billionaires...they are soopa smart and driven and spend most of their time in their "cave".  They generally turn out to reap tons of cash when they eventually emerge from their ladies here are the Top Three Geeks:

Bill Gates
Everyone knows that he is the founder of Microsoft Corp. Gates being one of the key people in computer technology revolution, is currently the chairperson of Microsoft.

His net worth is astonishing $59 billion. Gates is also one of the 100 people who influence the 20th century. With that, it is certainly evident that our life revolves around Bill Gates.

Stephen Hawking

The Britain born Geeks is well known for his contributions in cosmology and quantum gravity. Whatever the hell that is...

Despite his disability, Hawking does his research and comes out with a theory of his own about black holes.

He was also awarded a few notable prizes for his success in science field including the Copley Medal in 2006.

Tim Berners-Lee

And a huge thanx to the English developer who developed the World Wide Web in 1989. With the help of Mike Sendall at CERN, Tim’s invention is now widely used around the globe.  Just think how much boodle this bloke has? 

The World Wide Web was first used to integrate and connect the staff at CERN before it became a booming invention in the late nineties.

So ladies I'll bet you're already Googling to see if they're single....geek!

Top Ten ways to attract (and keep) a Geek.

Right, now that you know Geeks are loaded!  Apparently, Geeks make the best lovers too (loaded in a different way if you know what I mean *nudge nudge wink wink*.  Say no more....

But they require special care in order to attract and keep them. To that end, I have compiled the following top ten list. You may notice that we have used the set of male pronouns to describe the geek.  Please do not take offense. We know there are plenty of female geeks out there.

1. Make the first move. Why? There are so many reasons. Geeks are shy by nature. They haven’t learned the skills necessary to approach a potential partner. They will appreciate being let off the hook of potentially being embarrassed if they are turned down by the person that they approach. They will actually be flattered that you asked them.

2. Ask him to teach you something, like a game (chess, bridge, World of Warcraft). This could actually be the premise of going out on the first date, although it shouldn’t be the only activity. Suggest that you go for a meal and, after, he can teach it to you.

3. Ask him to tell you what he does in his field of interest (perhaps work, perhaps hobby). Look interested, you don’t even have to understand what he’s saying. In fact, telling him you don’t understand but that it sounds fascinating will turn him on.

4. Go to a geeky convention (Computers or Star Trek type) wearing an “I  Heart Geeks” Tee. Go up and talk to someone who looks interesting.

5. Gripe about your computer, especially if it’s Windows based. Chances are he’ll try to convert you to a Mac or Linux environment. What better way to spend a first date than having him install Linux on your computer?

6. Accept the fact that he won’t feel comfortable with your non-geeky friends. For that matter, accept the fact that your non-geeky friends will not be comfortable with him. Plan to have most of your dates involve just the two of you, or you and your mutual geek friends.

7. Accept the fact that having 2 or more computers and monitors is more important than being able to afford going out to a nice restaurant or show or wearing nice clothes (see 9 below).

8. Do buy him the newest technology (cell phone, PDA, game console, iPhone) as soon as it comes out – even if it requires spending a lot of money, and/or waiting in long lines at the Apple store.

9. Don’t buy him cool clothes. He will feel guilty for not wearing them, and at the same time might feel that it’s easier to break up with you than tell you that he hates them and won’t wear them.

10. Recognize that he’s happiest when he’s 'doing his thang'. Be supportive and congratulate him when he reaches a new level, whatever form that takes.

And Finally - The ultimate Blogging Geek Chick

Stephanie Pakrul, or StephTheGeek, is a blogger and her Tee is the blue screen of death,  a joke to those who are familiar with Microsoft Windows.  Give her a visit and leave a Geeky comment.


Post a Comment